"Metroid will never work as a first-person game," they said. "Metroid? With a multiplayer mode? That doesn't make sense," they said. "Metroid? With Multiplayer, on a dual-screen handheld with touch sensitivity and wireless play for up to 16 players?" They didn't say that, ut only because THEIR HEADS JUST EXPLODED.
-From an unsigned preview of Metroid Prime: Hunters (GMR #25, p. 58)
"Besides mentioning Hitman: Blood Money, which isn't even out yet, the list contained Shadow Hearts (it came out in 2001), and some title called Gunslinger Girls 2 (Perhaps they meant Gunslinger Girls Vol. 3, an import title) ... the funniest part was that the list (and its errors) was syndicated to newspapers around the country, with all its information blaring just as loud as the moral outrage."
-From an unsigned news story about the National Institute of Media and the Family's list of the worst violent video games (Game Informer #142, p. 26)
"My point? Just because you can string a few words together doesn't mean you can work at EGM--you have to know your games too. While you may not agree with some of our opinions, rest assured that they're based on something reasonable. How reasonable? Well, that's a discussion for the message boards and our therapists, but you should feel confident we know our s***, and we'll always give a million percent (why stop at 110?) to serve you best."
-Dan "Shoe" Hsu, in an introductory editorial about a great writer that didn't have the gaming knowledge it takes to work at EGM. (Electronic Gaming Monthly #189, p. 15)
"I love the video games, and the news hates the video games, so I hate the news. That's right, piss of news! The news is full of crazies who want me to be scared all the time... they blame everything on the video games. And it's true, it's true, that there are plenty of video games that tiny children should not play. I'm a grown-up lady. I need to shoot s***. I think it's best it occur fictionally."
-Comedian Jackie Kashian, from her Comedy Central special
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I saw that bit on Comedy Central and enjoyed it quite a bit. Her joke set on Final Fantasy Legend was hilarious.
ReplyDeleteFor the life of me I just can't figure out how those quotes connect...
ReplyDeleteJohn @ GamingTarget.com
A comment on the second comment... In their eagerness to point out errors in the list games, Mr/Ms Unsigned failed to notice that while Shadow Hearts itself is a few years old, Shadow Hearts: Covenant was a 2004 release.
ReplyDeleteAnd it did mean Gunslinger Girls. Vol 2 (released last year) is an interesting story because it is an anime release, yet placed decently on the Japanese weekly game release chart. It was apparently counted for the sales chart because the publisher slapped a "Compatible with Playstation 2" logo on it.
These quotes all connect because they're all cool quotes that I heard recently and liked. Also, three of them are about video game journalism (and the other one was found in a video game magazine and involves exploding heads, which are cool)
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